You are my God, save your servant who trusts in you. Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I call to you all day long. Bring joy to your servant, for to you, O Lord, I lift up my soul. You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you. – Psalm 86:1

I have come to realize that there have been two phases in my walk with The Lord. Early in my walk, I thought God was always out to get me. In my mind, He was watching me all the time and just waiting for me to do wrong so He could punish. I sure gave Him a lot of fuel to work with. It felt like I just gravitated towards wrong. I wondered why He didn’t change me. I wondered why He didn’t wave His magical hand and make me not want to sin anymore. Like the Adam in the Bible, I blamed Him for as much as I could. Like the Adam in the Bible, I found myself avoiding God. I would say at that point in my life, I trusted in the fact that I had said “the sinner’s prayer,” and that at least I felt rotten when I sinned. Trust in those things didn’t provide much security.

A great shift happened when I began to read His Word and take it seriously. Every believer must have a handle on God’s Word. I find that so few Christians actually read their Bible and spend time in it. It is a private discipline that reaps public rewards. It was five years after becoming a Christian that I began to read it for myself. Looking back, no wonder the above paragraph was true for me. I had no grasp on the Word of God. I had not hidden any of it in my heart that I might not sin (See Psalm 119:11).

Yesterday was a pretty bad day. I needed to go to my Heavenly Father. My first thought was, “I don’t need to bombard heaven right now since I haven’t really been seeking hard after Him.” You see, for a moment, I was trusting in my own goodness . . . my own righteousness. Isaiah 64:6 tells us what to think of our own righteousness. The truth is, as days, weeks, months, and years go by, one of our three enemies will draw us away from God. We have the devil, the world, and our own flesh that wars constantly against intimacy with God. No matter what the reason is that we’ve strayed from God’s real and tangible presence, we can always return to Him.

It doesn’t matter what we feel like . . . it matters what His Word says!

Just like the psalmist in Psalm 86:1, my trust is in Him! Not my own righteousness, nor my own goodness. Most people, even Christians, think they are going to heaven because they are a good person. If you stand before God’s throne with that answer on the day of judgement . . . it will not go well for you (see Matthew 7:21-23). No matter how long it has been since you’ve felt God’s presence, no matter what you’ve done, and no matter how badly you need Him now, you can privately draw near to Him! You have full and immediate access to the God of this Universe!

Come every soul by sin oppressed

There’s mercy with the Lord

And He will surely give you rest

By trusting in His Word

Only Trust Him!

You are my God, save your servant who trusts in you. Have mercy on me, O Lord, for I call to you all day long. When I read that line, Lord, the truth is that I don’t call to you all day long. I am so prone to leave and forget about the God that I love. Help me, your servant to stay more in tune with you, and to be more constantly aware of just how near you are to me. Bring joy to your servant, for to you, O Lord, I lift up my soul. You are forgiving and good, O Lord, abounding in love to all who call to you. May all who read this call to you today. Amen!