Elijah was afraid and ran for his life.  When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness.  He came to a broom bush, sat down under it, and prayed that he might die.  “I have had enough, Lord,” he said.  “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.”  Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.  – 1 Kings 19:3-5

Reading this little passage right after Elijah called down fire from heaven and won the day over the prophets of Baal is just astounding.  God had just done an amazing work and the people had pledged their allegiance to God over Baal.  However, as soon as Queen Jezebel made a threat towards Elijah’s life, he became afraid and ran for his life.  Wasn’t God powerful over her, too?  What had happened in Elijah’s heart, mind, and soul?

The more I live, the more I know what happened.

This past Sunday was quite possibly the best park service I’ve been a part of.  The Spirit of the Lord was ever so present, and it was all I could do to not cry the whole time.  I felt “Victory in Jesus” to the max!  We prayed for each other, people prayed for me and my family, and we just lingered for the longest time we have ever lingered at the park.  I just didn’t want to leave.

Within 24 hours of that service, I was exhausted.  It was a tiredness that I wasn’t used to.  Then, a very familiar attack on my family . . . an attack that I can without a doubt hit my knees and hand it all over to God 99.9% of the time came.  It was like I had no spiritual fervor.  Darkness just surrounded me.  I felt like it couldn’t get inside of me, but it was all over my skin and felt like it went around the entire world.  I was in despair.  I was, very similar to Elijah, under spiritual attack.  How in this world did this minor (in the grand scheme of things) thing bring me so low?

All it took to break free was a great night’s sleep and to spend some slow and methodic time with the Lord the next morning.  He showed me how I was relying on my own efforts too much and too often.  He showed me that, in my heart, I was thinking that I had some sort of spiritual power in and of myself.  After I repented, I immediately saw how it was and is He, and He alone, who guides our steps.  It is He, and He alone, who keeps the darkness at bay.  I am nothing, and do nothing, but keep my trust in Him. 

Come, every soul by sin oppressed

There’s mercy with the Lord

And He will surely give you rest

By trusting in His Word

Only trust Him, only trust Him

Only trust Him Now

He will save you, He will save you

He will save you now.

Lord, I can’t thank You enough for hitting a big reset on my faith.  It’s almost like I got saved for the first time.  More than anything, help me to simply keep my faith in You and You alone.  There is and never will be another like You.  You’ve been the best thing ever to happen to me.  Thank You for keeping me.  Thank You for blessing me like You do.  And thank You for keeping the darkness where it belongs.  Without You, I’d have no chance of keeping it from consuming me.  I love You, Lord.  With a thankful and full heart, I begin this day.  Amen!